I was gonna’ get skinny for the summer.

But tomorrow though, I’mma get fit.

I was gonna’ get skinny for the summer.
Photo by i yunmai / Unsplash

Back in December I made some predictions because that’s what you do in December. One of those predictions was this little gem:

The Trump family will be unmasked, Scooby-Doo style, as the real life Lannister. You know what I’m talking about. You know.Justin Cox

Unfortunately this hasn’t happened yet. Also, there’s a typo in there and it has bugged me for five months but I’m not going to change it here because I’ve kind of committed to it at this point.

In that list of amazing predicitons, I included this, which is why we’re here today:

I will attempt to lose 15 pounds. I know, it’s cliché but deal with it. But who am I really kidding? As always, Macklemore is right. -Justin Cox
Screenshot by the author.

I was doing well. Down almost seven pounds. And then Spring Break rolled into Easter and, well, food and laziness settled in. Last week I thought, “You know, May 1 seems like a good time to restart everything.”

Monday rolled around I got back on the horse. Ate my yogurt for breakfast. A nice wrap for lunch. Another wrap for dinner because I was lazy and my wife was at the gym. I did go to yoga to get a good stretch on. At the end of the night, I was under my calorie goal for the day! 1-day streak! What a great start to this whole May Resolution thing!

Then came Tuesday and I was off to another great start. More yogurt for breakfast. Another wrap for lunch. 2-day streak here I come. That’s when I had to make a quick trip to the farmer’s market for groceries. This, in and of itself, is not a bad thing. The problem is that one of the best bakeries in the world is two store-fronts down and really, why pass up an opportunity to get dessert?

Dessert, in this case, was a peanut-butter cheesecake square that was more rectangle-sent-from-the-gods than square. I didn’t bother logging it. I mean, losing a 1-day streak isn’t a big deal. That’s an easy one streak to catch back up with.

Peanut Butter Square from Charlie’s Bakery

So I started over again on Wednesday. Yogurt for breakfast. A wrap for lunch. You get the idea. That evening I was taking some of my leadership kids out to dinner at a local sports bar. I was going to make a sensible choice. Eat smart. Be healthy.

It was all you can eat boneless wings night. And that included fries. For $10.95.

Considering the grilled fish was like $14.95, this was clearly the more economical choice. Considering if I were to order 24 boneless wings, two baskets of fries, and a sensible order of celery (with blue cheese of course) it would have cost upwards of $25. But for $10.95? Shoot. What a deal!

So Wednesday was shot. But what are you going to do? There’s always Thursday.

Which brings us to today. Thursday. Star Wars Day.

I’m in a group that meets for breakfast every Thursday morning. Today we ate at a local barbecue place that also does breakfast because why not? I had a sensible egg dish with sausage and cheese, because I’m not a monster. But I forwent the french toast that appealed to me from the menu, because carbs are supposed to be from the devil, right? But then when a friend offered the last piece of her French toast, I couldn’t say no because wasting food is also supposed to be from the devil.

Anyway, fast forward until about 10:30 am when I’m on Instagram as you do and see that an amazing cookie shop in town was celebrating May the Fourth by offering a Kyber Cookie.

Are you strong with the Dark Side or Light Side? Find balance in the Force with our limited Kyber Cookie. Half Chocolate Chip covered in White Chocolate and half Triple Chocolate Chip covered in salty sprinkles of Kyber Crystals. Small batch, handmade and very limited edition. Available starting today! May the 4th Be With You! -Gideon’s Bakehouse

Really, how can you pass that up? You can’t. And I didn’t.

Since I didn’t bother logging breakfast what’s the point in logging anything for the day? Let’s splurge and get that Kyber Cookie action on!

So I drove over there and waited 25 minutes in line because this place is that good and then ordered my limited edition Kyber Cookie. While I was there I also picked up their amazing chocolate chip, toffee, and pistachio because why waste the trip?

I can always pick up that 1-day streak again tomorrow. But it is Cinco de Mayo and I foresee tacos in my future… so maybe Saturday?


I should probably start on Monday instead.

A version of this article also appeared on Medium.