Minor plot spoilers will be contained in the paragraphs that follow. In the instance of a major spoiler I’ll be using my fancy spoiler tags simply because I can. I’ll try and keep the information mostly spoiler free, but just in case something comes up, it’ll be blacked out. Mouse over to read the line. Note that the spoiler tags don’t work in RSS so you have been warned.

The Cast of the Battlestar Galactica Miniseries

Cylons are robots that man created to make life easier and, like all robots eventually do, turned on mankind and attempted to kill everyone. A truce was reached and the war ended. That was 40 years ago. The Battlestar Galactica is a special battleship that was designed to fight in the Cylon War. It has no networked computers and extremely antiquated equipment. As such, it’s being decommissioned and turned into a museum. Though on the day this ceremony is taking place, the Cylons decide to return and eradicate the human race thus quickly bringing the Galactica out of retirement.

Over the course of the three hour miniseries the remaining 50,000 human survivors are gathered and make a Faster Than Light (FTL) jump to a remote outpost where ammunition and supplies are stored. Here a major air battle is fought before another FTL jump towards destination unknown in an effort to run from the Cylon forces and preserve the human race.

Among the survivors not enlisted and assigned to the Galactica are Dr. Gaius Baltar, the premiere advanced robotic mind who, unbeknownst to everyone including himself, was sleeping with a Cylon before the nukes started to fall; President Laura Roslin who, before the bombs fell, was actually the Secretary of Education; some little kid who won a lottery instituted by Lt. Boomer while she was fixing her ship on Caprica; and some others I don’t feel like pointing out.

The major revelation to the crew of the Galactica is that the Cylons have 12 new models that look, feel, and bleed like humans. Over the course of the miniseries 4 models are revealed: the attractive one that Gaius was sleeping with whom he still sees and interacts with despite her actually being there, a smuggler Captain Adama kills while they are getting supplies from the outpost, a “survivor” on the President’s ship, and — in the twist at the end of the series — Lt. Boomer herself. Evidently some of the models are “sleeper agents” and don’t know they are Cylons. Seemingly until the 12 models are discovered, the human race isn’t safe.

The miniseries concludes with a roaring speech given by Captain Adama about a mythical planet in deep space that could be used as refuge — if they can find it (or it exists). The plant, the destination for the Galactica and the survivors, is Earth. It’ll be cool to see if they ever make it or run into anybody along the way.

The miniseries is pretty solid, though was a little boring until about the last hour or so. I’ll give it a little grace considering they had a lot of characters and history to introduce. It’s like the Star Wars: Episode I curse. Either way, by the end I was pretty engaged and am curious to see how things play out.

Given that the Cylons seem to be tricky folk, I am going to make some bold predictions. I think that all of the characters I introduced above — Gaius, President Roslin, and that creepy kid — are all Cylons whether they know it or not. In the case of Gaius and Roslin, I don’t think they know it. My other guess for a Cylon is Colonel Tigh just because I don’t like him very much. Granted, I’m more than likely wrong on all of these, but that’s why I call them bold predictions. Frankly, I hope I’m wrong because then watching the episodes unfold wouldn’t be very fun. I was surprised when Boomer was revealed a Cylon so hopefully the rest of them will be just as surprising.

There you have it. I now know what a Cylon is and can use it in multiple sentences with varying degrees of interest — depending on who you are I guess.

The first reason is simply that there aren’t any movies that people are willing to spend money on. The general crop of movies lately sucks. There aren’t any blockbusters action picks like an Independence Day or dramas like a Forrest Gump. Occasionally a film of that caliber comes along but they are few and far between and more often then not only seen in art houses–if at all. Of course there are a few exceptions. Star Wars earned over 370 million dollars this summer–but that is because it carried the name Star Wars. Cinderella Man, hyped as the year’s first great Oscar contender, flopped earning just under 60 million dollars. It is as if the taste of Hollywood and the general moviegoer have become out of sync over the last few years.

Theaters themselves are also to blame for poor attendance. I don’t know about you, but when I go to the movies and spend my six dollars to rent my chosen seat for two hours of time, I do not want to be inundated with advertisements for twenty minutes prior to the start of the film. Trailers are one thing; I welcome them as they are sometimes more interesting then the movie. But a Coke commercial followed by a recruiting ad for the Army? Come on, if I wanted to see those I would have just stayed home. The worst offender of this is Regal Cinemas. They actually have a “pre show” before the trailers they call the “Twenty.” It’s twenty minutes of crap–TV show commercials and “behind the scenes” looks at musical acts, all filled with advertising of course. For this reason I avoid Regal Cinemas if at all possible. If I had it my way, there would be no pre-show advertising. This, however, may lead to another nail in Hollywood’s proverbial coffin.

If you have seen a big budget action movie over the last few years, you may have noticed the ridiculous amount of product placement therein. Minority Report, iRobot, and this year’s The Island are big offenders. Each film features low angled, panning shots of a particular car–a car that in each case happened to be recently released to the market. For instance, in The Island–a so-so social commentary on bioethics staring Ewan McGregor and Scarlett Johansson–there are shots of the Dodge Charger, Dodge Magnum, and the Cadillac Cien concept. The Island also contains focused shots on bottles of Aquafina water, Miller beer and Reebok sneakers. I don’t think Hollywood will ever stoop as low as The Truman Show parodied, where the actor takes a moment to talk about the benefits of a certain product–though you never know. If they continue to loose money from ticket sales, they will continue to look for sources of revenue from other arenas, one of which will be product placement.

No matter what their choice of remedy, Hollywood needs to do something to curtail it’s slipping returns at the box office. I for one enjoy seeing a film on the big screen with speakers at every possible angle. Though if the films continue to be of poorer quality and they continue to be filled with ads both prior too and during, I just might start waiting for DVD as well.

Apparently the AFI took in 400 nominees and then whittled this massive list down to the top 50 heroes and the top 50 villains. It’s interesting to note, though, that the 400 nominees were not nominated to a category of hero or villain which is why some of these people could swing both ways… and some did. Take for example the T-800 better known as the Terminator. Arnold’s portrayal in Terminator 2: Judgment Day earned him a 48th place ranking on the hero list. Though, surprisingly the same role in The Terminator won 22nd villain. I’m not to sure about that, but hey, if Freddy Krueger can pick up a 40th ranking on the villain list, then I guess anything is possible.

Another guy that could have possible swung both ways was the infamous Mr. Blonde (also known as Vic Vega) from Mr. Tarantino’s first film, Reservoir Dogs. Sadly the scene where Mr. Blonde is stuck in the middle with that poor rookie cop didn’t earn him a spot on either list, but at least he was nominated. Tarantino’s other Vega, Vincent, was nominated along with his partner Jules Winnfiled for Pulp Fiction but they both also fell short of the list.

Other classic characters that fell short of the AFI’s list were William Wallace from Braveheart, John Shaft from the Shaft movies, Jack Ryan from anything written by Tom Clancy (though I am a bigger fan of Harrison Ford as Jack rather than Ben Affleck or Alec Baldwin), Rudy Ruettiger from Rudy, Martin Riggs and Roger Murtaugh from the Lethal Weapon series, John Rambo from the Rambo series, Annie Porter and Jack Traven from Speed (hey, some people–including me–do actually enjoy this movie), Snake Plissken from Escape from New York and Escape from LA, the evil Bible thumping Warden Samuel Norton from The Shawshank Redemption, The Matrix’s Neo/Mr. Anderson, Tony “Scarface” Montana, Lt. Pete “Maverick” Mitchell from Top Gun, Captain John H. Miller from Saving Private Ryan (surprisingly), Detective John McClane from the Die Hard series, Buzz Lightyear from Toy Story one and two, Captain James T. Kirk from any Star Trek movie, Jaws from a hand full of Bond movies, Men in Black’s Agents J and K, Ethan Hunt from Mission:Impossible one and two, the extremely chilling and evil John Doe from se7en, and, to round out this list of characters who didn’t quite make it, Forrest Gump from Forrest Gump. Some of these I can understand, but I think Forrest Gump and his endless supply of chocolates and stories is one of film’s greatest heroes. Oh well.

Anyway, now that I’ve rambled on about characters that didn’t make the AFI list I guess I should turn to people whom did make the list. The suspense is killing you isn’t it? Mwhahahahaha. Ok, here goes.

General Maximus Decimus Meridus from the blockbuster hit Gladiator started the hero list while Alonzo Harris from Training Day started the villain list. The genius Verbal Kint from The Usual Suspects received a 48 ranking on the villain list. The Star Wars saga made a pretty strong showing with Obi-Wan Kenobi as the 37th hero of all time, Han Solo as the 14th hero, and Darth Vader as film’s 3rd most evil character ever. Though Detective John McClane didn’t make the hero list, his enemy from the original Die Hard movie Hans Gruber appeared as histories 46th villain. Funny because I would have thought his brother was more evil in Die Hard with a Vengeance. Batman (46th) and his counterpart the Joker (45th) both made the AFI’s list while the sexy yet scary Catwoman fell short. The Bond franchise grazed the villain list with Auric Goldfinger’s 49th placing though was salvaged by the one and only Bond, James Bond receiving the bronze medal position on the hero list.

Now, some of the characters that made the list just made me wonder what the hell the AFI was smoking. Take for instance the number 20 villain of all time… Man. Yes man. According the the American Film Institute the portrayal of Man in Disney’s Bambi was more villainous than Jack Torrance from The Shining, Count Dracula, and a ton of other characters. MAN! Oh boy. Some other “characters” in the top 20 villain list are The Shark from Jaws (18), The Alien from Alien (14), HAL9000 from 2001: A Space Odyssey (13), The Queen from Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs (10), The Wicked Witch of the West from The Wizard of Oz (4), and Norman Bates’ Psychotic experience won him the silver medal.

Jimmy Stewart is evidently a very heroic man considering his character’s George Bailey from It’s a Wonderful Life (9) and Jefferson Smith from Mr. Smith Goes to Washington (11) made it in the top 15. Apparently the AFI felt that Ellen Ripley from the Alien series was good enough for an 8th place showing on the hero list. Edging her out was the one and only Rocky Balboa from the Rocky saga (7), Clarice Starling from The Silence of the Lambs (6), and yes, Dr. Indiana Jones won the right to be the second best hero in cinematic history. I would have given Junior the top billing but the AFI didn’t ask for my opinion.

Ok, so here we are. The moment you have either been waiting for or have been running from, take your pick. I don’t really feel like giving any more introduction than this, so lets just jump right into it. We’ll start with the AFI’s most heroic character of all time. Why? Because I think they made a mistake. According to the AFI the winning honors was given to Atticus Finch from To Kill a Mockingbird. I mean, he stood up for what was good in a court case, so what? He’s not a hero. He was just a guy doing his job. Whatever. At least the AFI redeemed itself with the crowning of the number one villain of all time. In my opinion they hit the nail on the head. Dr. Hannibal Lecter is the most frightening and methodical character of all time. I mean, he reads poetry and looks at paintings and goes to the opera and then eats people. And even though he is in a cage for the majority of the movies he is in, he still freaks the living daylights out of me. So, for all these reasons and probably more, Hannibal Lecter earned himself a place in cinematic history.

Well folks, there you have it. A brief (yeah right) rendition of the AFI’s top 100 heroes and villains of all time. Well, look at it this way. At least you didn’t have to put up with the three hour special on CBS hosted by Arnold Schwarzenegger. In case you wanted to see the complete list of winners and nominees for all of the AFI’s lists, you can check it out at their website.