The self-imposed sanctions FSU levied were no slouch either. Football players were benched for 4 games, including a bowl game, five scholarships were removed, and the athletic program was put on probation for two years. Florida State was attempting to make a statement that this was a serious offense and as such they were going to take it seriously.

Despite finding no additional violations or lack of institutional control, yesterday the NCAA decided it wasn’t enough. Six more scholarships were canceled, another four years of probation was tacked on and the school will have to vacate wins from games ineligible athletes participated in during the two year period in question. The exact number of games that will be vacated is currently unknown, but there is fear that both the 2006 and 2007 football season could be completely lost which would leave Bobby Bowden fifteen games behind Pterno, rather than one. On top of that, there is a possibility that at least one of the three consecutive men’s track and field National Championships could be lost as well.

More than likely this whole issues stems from a number of years ago when FSU president TK Wetherell threatened to sue the NCAA when they informed FSU, and other schools, that use of Indian themed mascots was defamatory. Wetherell, with the support of the Seminole Tribe of Florida, threatened legal action against the NCAA and eventually the NCAA’s entire push disappeared with no action by any school. The NCAA has had it out for Florida State ever since and finally got an opportunity to extract some revenge.

Frankly this is absolutely ridiculous. When FSU self-reported and imposed their own consequences they were praised for handling the situation so well and cleanly. But then comes in the NCAA and says, yeah, you did good, but we’re going to take it a few steps further. What’s this say to other schools who decide to self-report in the future? How about this: “Don’t bother. You’re better off sweeping it under the rug and hoping no one finds out because no matter what you do the NCAA will drop the hammer.”

Or, as TideNOVA on EPSN put it:

This is basically setting up a precedent for all colleges. The feeling is “come forward and cooperate, you will be punished harsher” and as with USC and Bush and Mayo “don’t cooperate and deny, you will get of scott free with no investigation.”

FSU does not yet know the number of wins they will be forced to vacate, but they have said any number will be contested. This is a long ways from being over.

Myron Rolle is a role model for his off-field pursuits.

Myron Rolle’s one-on-one interview for the Rhodes Scholarship was at noon today. Interviews with him and Bobby Bowden show that Myron understands that he’s a student first and an athlete second. Once his interview was complete, Rolle’s waiting game began. While his teammates were warming up and getting ready for their game, Myron was finding out he would be one the 30 Rhodes Scholars for 2009. Shortly after finding out, the second half of Myron’s day began.

He boarded a private jet chartered by FSU and cleared by the NCAA and headed to Maryland. He was given a police escort to the stadium and, after warming up, was able to come in on the final defensive set of downs in the first half.

Myron Rolle’s whirlwind day ended with FSU beating Maryland keeping their ACC hopes alive. While the win was important, the star of the game was Myron Rolle. He was even drenched with Power Aid (Noles don’t drink Gatorade) after the game.

On the same day that University of Florida’s head coach, Urban Meyer, said in a pre-game interview that he’d be disappointed if his team didn’t put sixty points up against 4-7 Citadel, it’s good to see a different side of college football. While FSU didn’t put up 70 points against Maryland, they had a story that is even more impressive; they can claim one of only a handful of Rhodes Scholar student athletes in history.

Congratulations to Myron Rolle for all he has been able to do both on and off the field.

I graduated from The Florida State University a little over a week ago with a degree in Business Administration. I actually don’t have the degree yet. It comes in the mail at some point, or so they tell me. I guess it was pretty cool now, but while I was actually graduating it just seemed like a big pain. Let me put it in context.

The night before the ceremony I was packing until 2am. Four hours of sleep later I was up and getting dressed, amidst the revelation that the ‘Runaway Bride’ made the story up, and heading out the door for Commencement. Three hours later I was back in my dorm moving out. It just seemed like a big mess, but now I’m a college graduate and that is pretty cool.

You could say I’m putting off my entrance to the real world by just a little bit. No, I’m not going on to get an MBA or a law degree, but I am working at the church as the Summer Youth Intern. Basically I get to plan out the summer for the kids and make it all happen. It’s actually a lot of fun and a pretty sweet way to transition into the working world.

On the web side of things, it seems I have a boat load of web pages to be working on of late. There is this one, the old Bryan Hall site, my newly acquired www.JustinCox.com, and two new sites: one for a hosting company and the other for a friend seeking fame as an actress. Look for more information on those once the sites are completed.

I guess you can say I’ve been keeping pretty busy and probably will throughout the summer. Mixed in all the above activities I’m going to be trying to find a job so if anyone has something to offer, feel free to contact me. But that’s my life in a nutshell. Maybe I’ll try and update more often here and actually make this site worth viewing. We’ll see.

Let’s face it. Everyone who reads this drivel is a common person and common people make common resolutions: loose weight, read a book, eat a baby, etc. Because of this, it wouldn’t be much fun to talk about these. So, I’m going to use my power to make resolutions not for myself, but for people who really need them: celebrities.

My first resolution is for Miss Britney Spears. Oh wait, I’m sorry, it’s now Mrs. Britney Alexander. In case you haven’t heard pop music’s little school girl who apparently wed her “longtime friend” Jason Alexander (no guys, is not the one who went to Boone) in Las Vegas. Was she drunk? Will it be annulled when the court opens tomorrow morning? Who knows, but here is Britney’s resolution for 2004: If you annul this marriage, remember the story of the boy who cried wolf because I don’t want to see you on CNN saying “Oops I did it again…”

The next resolution I’m going to dish out this evening is for the one and only Michael Jackson. You may be crazy, and you may or may not have touched that little boy where the sun don’t shine while he slept in your bed, I don’t really care. But, one thing I’m pretty certain about is that the police didn’t abuse you as you so claim. So, give it up. Try and go to trial with some sort of dignity, well at least as much as a former black man turned white woman can have.

Xavier Beitia, this next one’s for you. Two years ago it was wide left, two nights ago it was wide right. In nine months you get to play Miami again. Your resolution should be to learn to kick against them. Because, you know, with Jeff Bowden calling plays and Chris Rix attempting to make them, FSU needs some help.

Finally, as I’m sure everyone knows Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen turn 18 this year. Like I’ve mentioned before, a quick search for “Olsen Twins Countdown” on Google will bring up dozens of websites dedicated to informing the waiting public of the exact number of seconds until this occurs. So, to the Olsen twins: follow in the great Hilton sisters footsteps that have paved the way before you. You should strive to be like them — just, you know, minus the severe stupidity.

The first big news story of 2003 was, regrettably, a tragic one. On February 1st, NASA’s shuttle Columbia disintegrated upon reentry killing all seven crew members onboard. This was the first major loss to NASA since the Challenger tragedy in 1986. Debris from the shuttle was found over much of the United States. In August, NASA confirmed that faulty heat-shield tiles were to blame for the disaster and vowed to check every inch of the remaining three shuttles in its fleet. The shuttle program is still grounded and is said to remain so well into 2004.

Arguably the largest story of 2003 is that of the war in Iraq. The problem escalated until March 19th when a coalition of nations — mainly the US and the UK — began Operation Iraqi Freedom. The goal was to finally end Saddam Hussein’s totalitarian rule over the Iraqi people. A swift bombing campaign was followed by a massive swell of ground troops who marched into downtown Baghdad on April 9th. On that day the immense statue of Saddam at the city square was torn down for the world to see. It would be a good eight months later, on December 14th at 7:30am EST when Paul Bremer announced “We got him.” Ironically Saddam’s capture came not in a hale of bullets but with a cowardly surrender.

2003 also saw the first successful recall of a state governor. Gray Davis was effectively thrown out of office with an October 7th vote that in turn installed non other then Arnold Schwarzenegger as the new governor of California. Schwarzenegger vowed, in an extremely impressive inauguration speech, to fix California’s problems and get the power back to the people.

One of the most obnoxious stories of 2003 has to be the constant press that Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez — AKA JLo — received. The press focused constantly on the upcoming wedding and how much in love the two were. That was until July 15th with the release of Gigli. Considerably one of the worst pieces of film ever made, (The Internet Movie Database has Gigli ranked in the top 10 of the bottom 100 movies in history. Also up there is From Justin to Kelly.), Gigli bombed at the box office and reports came out saying that the wedding was now off. Frankly I don’t really give a crap what the new story on them is, so I’m ending this segment here.

It’s hard to call it the fad of 2003, but in a way, it kind of is. Severe Acute Repository Syndrome, or SARS for short, swept the globe seemingly instantly killing 750 people in over 25 countries. SARS was a mystery until it was discovered by a scientist who later died from the very virus. The largest concentration of victims seemed to hit in Japan and Toronto. Shortly before the virtual elimination of SARS from the globe, and thus the news, an Asian design firm unveiled designer SARS masks allowing people to stay safe and be fashionable at the same time.

The sports world saw some very odd occurrences in 2003. Tampa Bay won the Super Bowl. The Florida Marlins won the World Series. FSU lost to Georgia in the Orange Bowl and Ohio Sate beat Miami in the Fiesta Bowl to win the National Championship. The Orlando Magic went 1-19 to open their 2003-2004 season and FSU basketball went 9-0 to open theirs. It just goes to show that when it comes to sports you can’t take anything for granted.

Yes, a lot happened in 2003. So much that I have only briefly skimmed the surface with this trice recap. But here’s to the completion of one year and to a great year to come. All of us here at Lone Palm Creations wish everyone a merry Christmas/happy Hanukkah/merry Kwanza and a happy new year!

So the other day I promised a big announcement–I hope you are ready. I, the one and only Justin Cox and owner/founder/chief author of Lone Palm Creations have made it big time. I have made the jump from online media to print media. So if you all will procure yourself a copy of the New York Times… oh wait, no, that’s next year. But you do have to start somewhere. It’s currently just after one in the morning here in Florida and as I type this, an article I wrote is being printed in millions of copies of the Orlando Sentinel–the local paper for, you guessed it, Orlando. If you can’t see through my sarcastic humor, I am pretty excited. And this is only the beginning. I’m going to continue to write and hopefully, continue to be published until one day, yes one day I too can embellish facts and invent stories like a real journalist–or something like that. Maybe. Anyway, enough bantering. Below is the article that one day will be known as “the one that started it all.” Enjoy it. Oh yeah, and if you don’t believe me, here’s the link to the article at the Sentinel’s web site: Orlando Sentinel

“When College is Easy”
Originally printed in The Orlando Sentinel on Saturday, November 15th, 2003:

In high school all the teachers would say “you better shape up, because college is much tougher then you may think.” Well, I’m currently in my third year of college and I have to disagree. Granted, I have taken some challenging courses while up here, though, for the most part college has been easy.

One of the biggest problems is horrible professors–or more often then not grad students posing as professors. Case in point, last semester I took meteorology being taught by a grad student. He cared more about what we thought of him then the weather and as a result I have no idea what low barometric pressure means but I can make one hell of a hurricane chart. I’m currently taking a law class from a professor who will remain nameless–though does hold a pretty prominent state-government job and looks a lot like George Costanza when he tries on the toupee. This professor, after giving us our first test, disappeared from the face of the planet for not one, not two, but THREE weeks! How am I, a diligent young college student, supposed to learn anything when the professor doesn’t even want to show up to class?

Another problem with today’s college scene is some of the tests–they don’t test students’ knowledge, they test our memories. I’m currently in a class where both questions and answers to twenty five percent of each test are handed out beforehand by the professor. The only catch is that you memorize the answer and write them, neatly, word for word with the proper spelling (which is actually a problem for me because I cannot spell for ship–see, what did I tell you?).

This is not to say, however, that all of my college courses are this easy. I do have some that are quite difficult, where you actually have to think, not to mention dodge the occasional eraser the professor throws when wrong answers are given in class. But this all does lead me to wonder, is college necessary for success? Quentin Tarantino dropped out of the ninth grade. Bill Gates did pretty well for quitting college as did Ashton Kutcher, though I wouldn’t say he’s done anything substantial in his life, except maybe Demi Moore.

But I digress. The point is that college is obviously not challenging us enough. I mean, if it were I wouldn’t be writing this article at four in the morning. Instead I would be studying or sleeping soundly, my mind contently filled with quantum physics or something like that. But until that happens, I’ll make the most of my eraser throwing professors who hand out grades–when they actually come to class.

The long and short of it, the concert was very wet and muddy. Got to love the outdoor shows. A full set list will be added to the Buffett portion of my site when I feel like doing so. It wasn’t the best concert I’ve been to. I was glad to see that Jimmy played some stuff that he usually doesn’t, I enjoy that stuff more. Yes I’m a Parrothead but no I don’t cream myself every time I hear a song off Songs You Know By Heart. I’d rather hear him play “The Wino and I Know” or “That’s What Living is to Me” or “We Are the People Our Parents Warned Us About.” But, it seems like anyone that goes to the concerts anymore have only heard the songs Buffett has on Songs You Know By Heart which is all fine and dandy, but when it comes to other songs that they cant sing along to in a drunken stupor they then talk to their friends and ignore the concert. This again, is all fine and dandy but that prevents the true fans that are there to hear Buffett play, i.e. me, from actually hearing Bubba sing. During this concert I felt something I had never felt at a Buffett concert before, and that was detest. Namely because the one part of Jimmy’s show that I look forward to every year is his acoustic set. I love it because he plays songs that I love and they just sound wonderful acoustically. However this year I didn’t get to enjoy the acoustic set because of the people talking and gallivanting around the lawn section of the concert. I also did another thing that I hadn’t done at a Buffett concert before, and that was leave before the encores. I said at the time it was to beat the traffic as we were in dire need of gas, but I really didn’t want to stick around because I wasn’t going to enjoy them. I kick myself now of course seeing that Jimmy played “Southern Cross” as well as “Pacing the Cage” which I absolutely love, but, that’s the way it goes I guess. The only true saving grace amongst the mud and noise was that after trekking across THE ENTIRE mud covered concert venue in an effort to get closer to where we parked, I ran into Casey who promptly ran up to me which pretty much made my night. If it hadn’t been for her, I probably would have left the concert pretty pissed off and disappointed. So thank you Casey, you made my day, as you do every time I see you. After the concert we went back to my aunt’s where I slept more soundly then I have in weeks.

The next morning we got up and headed down to Orlando. Thankfully the 500 mile drive only took around six and a half hours. To recap I had traveled roughly 750 miles within a 24 hour period. And the weekend was just starting.

In Orlando I had friends from Tallahassee come into town to visit for Easter. Friday night we met up with Earl and Jessica which is always fun. We played Pictionary and joked around till late at night. The next day, we’re now to Saturday, led to Islands of Adventure.

My friends from school all went to the wonderful place known as IOA by us local freaks and had a great time. Lines weren’t horrible and the rides, as always were lots of fun. Every time I ride it, I can’t help but think of how cool the Spider-Man ride is. It’s probably the best ride ever. The day at the park was great. It was made even better because Ryan’s uncle got us all tickets. He came with us and was really a nice guy. This is a big thank you to Ryan’s uncle. After IOA came a well welcomed dinner and the movie Pumpkin which is, to say the least, interesting.

Then came Sunday, Easter Sunday. I went to church–both services–as I do on all “big occasion” Sundays though this time was accompanied by my friends from school. The services were, well, not great. The sermon was horrible and I had the pleasure of hearing it twice. If only our assistant pastor would be given the chance to speak because he is a lot more entertaining that our senior pastor–who thankfully will be leaving in June. At least our church’s Easter tradition of singing the Hallelujah Chorus was upheld. It sounded wonderful.

After church came the Easter festivities. This involved Easter egg hunting, badminton playing, and of course, lots and lots of eating — and some picture taking. Always love the Easter festivities. Then came the ride home.

Now it’s back to reality. The fun is over. I found out that I completely failed my finance test from last week and now passing the entire class could be in jeopardy. Returning to Tallahassee has brought me back to some situations I am tired of dealing with as well as opened me up to more that I have to deal with. Regardless of the situation, the test grades and what not, I always end up getting screwed in the end. But, c’est la vie, that’s life right? Emerson once wrote that “every sweet has it’s sour; every evil it’s good” which was so wonderfully retold in Vanilla Sky. I guess I’m tasting the sour right now. Hopefully the summer, which is now less than two weeks away, will bring something really sweet my way. And to think, I only have to get through five finals first!

Well that’s that. I know this article is a little drab but you gotta write about what you know right? At least that’s what Mark Twain once said. Mr. Twain also wrote the words that inspired Buffett’s “That’s What Living is to Me” that goes: “Be good and you will be lonesome/Be lonesome and you will be free/Live a lie, and you will live to regret it/That’s what living is to me.” Well, sometimes, that is what living is to me. Until next time.

See, I have had quite an eventful… well, week I assume? Last Wednesday night I did something I haven’t done in years (you will notice that I will repeat this statement a few times over the course of this article). What was it you ask? Well here you go, I’ll tell you. I went go-karting and played laser tag. It was quite fun. It reminded me of the days that Q-Zar was still open as well as that go-kart place that used to be next to I-4 at I-Drive which is now a hotel; if you’re from Orlando you know what I’m talking about. But yeah, it was a ton of fun. In laser tag I came in second with like a bazillion points.

Anyway, last Friday night was Mike’s 20th birthday part (Mike of course is my neighbor and future roommate). So, in grand tradition, we threw him a party; but we first took him out to dinner at Outback. Gots to love me some ribs. The party was fun. Mike and Brian sang the Elephant Love Duet, I learned how to salsa dance (kind of), and we made a loud ruckus until early, early the next morning.

That next day, Saturday, unfolded with great fun of its own. It all started with a trip to the Student Life Building to watch Catch Me If You Can which is a great movie. Later that night I played something I haven’t played in literally years–I mean, we’re talking 5 or 6 years here people. There were six of us who got together and turned the lights down low and the volume up and played “Nightmare.” Now, if you don’t know, “Nightmare” is a video/board game where, well, basically you bow down to The Gatekeeper who likes to be mean and make life difficult. He especially loved me. Not only was I his “old one” but I was also his “chosen one.” We did win the game, though it came down to the wire. With 20 seconds left, Caity hit the stop button–but in true fashion, the video started again and ran for another five or six seconds. It was tense but lots of fun.

After the game, now around 2am, we attempted to play “Lite as a Feather, Stiff as a Board” though it didn’t really work out too well. Regardless, the night was still young. A trip to Wal-Mart was in the works and by 3ish we were there, gallivanting around the store. Did you know that they sell Peanut Butter Slices along with Cheese Slices? Yeah, its pretty gross but they do it and evidently people buy it–according to the women stocking the shelves. It’s interesting to note though, that the product line has been discontinued. Funny thing.

Well, as you can imagine Wal-Mart is quite fun late at night, or early in the morning. We all bought fun hats: Fire Chief helmets for the guys and a “Ghetto Little Bow Peep Hat” for Amanda. Matt and I also bought swords for good measure. After Wal-Mart we took our new gear and headed over to Whataburger for breakfast. Needless to say we got some interesting looks from the numerous cops “taking a break” in the restaurant.

Upon returning to campus we decided it was time to capture the moment, which meant taking pictures in the once fun filled but now boring existence known as Bryan Hall. That’s right; it was time to go back. Night Staff is quite friendly at 5 in the morning. It was quite sad, though, that BHall wasn’t as hopping as it was when we lived there. I guess we were the end of an era. Oh well. C’est la vie.

Anyway, after some much needed sleep which didn’t begin until after the sun came up, Sunday brought forth it’s own fun times. Sunday night a bunch of us got together and watched a movie we hadn’t seen in years (see, I told you I’d say that a lot). I bet you’ll never guess which movie it was… Come on, guess… Ok, it was The Neverending Story. Laugh it up, but you know you’d watch it too. It is funny, though, to watch this movie now being much wiser. Bet you didn’t know that The Neverending Story is full of sexual references and innuendos. I mean, just ask Erin what her theory on the Southern Oracle is; and don’t forget about the massive breasts that are featured in about every scene while Bastion is attempting to pass through the first set of gates on the way to the Southern Oracle. Oh it’s fun to overanalyze things.

But yeah, that is where I’ve been for the last week or so. Not to mention the fact that somewhere in there I’ve taken three tests with another on its way. Aint life’s balancing act fun? I’d also like to thank everyone who responded with their support for my last article. I guess I didn’t realize that there was as much support as I had first believed. Anyway, that’s that. Until next time.

SB03 started with a little running around, a field that is. Ever try to play Frisbee at night? No? Well how about with a glow in the dark Frisbee? Still no? Well, let me tell you it doesn’t really work to well. Though, my friends and I had fun trying. There is nothing like running through a large, wet, grass field carrying a Frisbee in the middle of the night being chased by a half naked guy trying to catch you while girls are screaming “kill the man with the Frisbee.” So much fun. Good times, good times. On a side note I’ll have you know that at the end of that night (and by end I mean around 12:45 AM) I purchased The Boondock Saints for only $9.99 at Blockbuster video. Mad props to my man Wayne for finding it for me.

Well, that was the weekend before SB03 officially began. It’s always good to get going early; well, not always but sometimes and in this case it is true. Anyway, the main portion of SB03 consisted of my roommate Brian, my future roommate Mike, my friend Kyle, and I taking a week long trip to the wonderful world called Daytona Beach, Florida. We stayed in a great hotel called the Treasure Island Resort. The room had a full kitchen complete with pots and pans and such, had a balcony overlooking the ocean and, well all the other stuff hotel rooms have. Judging by the view from the balcony and the price we paid. I think it’s safe to say we won this week.

We pretty much spent the week hanging out with all the people in our hotel, who apparently were all from Ohio. We also found it in our best interest to laugh at, well, everyone for various reasons. One girl disserved our laughing at because she was, well, a Swamp Donkey (just picture it). Mike found it in himself to insult a deaf guy, Kyle, well, never mind. My good friend Casey (for those that don’t know Casey and I will be getting married when we turn 30) managed to come over and hang out one evening as did another friend Travis who’s car ended up getting towed in the process. Oh well, c’est la vie. I also managed to fit in an Atlanta Braves Spring Training game. Maddox pitched 4 innings of no hit ball and the Braves went on the beat the Dodgers 5-3.

On Friday, we left the Treasure Island Resort and headed for my house for the remainder of the weekend. The highlight of the final weekend of SB03 was the massive, if not epic, pool part thrown at my place last Saturday night. It was the first ever merging of my Orlando friends and my Tallahassee friends along with my brother, mom and step dad in the mix. It went over quite well if I do say so myself. There were a bunch of people there and I probably could count and give a complete number but, well, I choose not to (it’s late and I’m getting tired). It was a great time. Everyone ended up in the pool at some point, my mom and Caity shared some wine, tons of meat was consumed (except baby meat), and many poop stories were shared. It’s good when that happens because they are funny. Anyway, the pool party was a great cap for a great Spring Break.

I’m just going to end it here.

Fin.

Secondly, I have decided, along with the help of my friend the Supreme Evil, to start a mafia family. I have yet to decide, however, what nationality we will represent, or if any for that matter. It will probably end up being the first ever non-discriminating mafia legacy, unless of course we hate you, then well, you get the idea. I really don’t care how it works out so long as I have power, money, and access to lots of weapons. Because, after all, guns are cool. Not as cool as a Fiery Sword of Justice, but cool none-the-less.

Q. Is Caity responsible for any of this?
A. If by Caity you mean the one whom is middle-nameless and by responsible you mean forced me to watch Boondock Saints, then maybe, maybe not.

This was an eventful weekend, can you tell? Saturday morning I fought, for the better part of an hour, with Ticketmaster.com. Some people prefer to call Ticketmaster by it’s true unholy name, TicketBastard. I’m not going to take sides, but well, yeah. Ticketmaster is the devil and deserves a Fiery Sword up its… you get the idea. Long and the short of that topic is four tickets to April’s Jimmy Buffett concert in Atlanta have been purchased. The things I do…

Q. How fast does you’re mind work?
A. Faster than yours.

A. Yes. I told you so.
Q. Does it always work that fast?

A lot of you have been wondering, due to the general tone of my away messages (and probably fueled by the nature of this article) if I have completely lost my mind. The answer is no… well maybe. I would just like to set the record straight that Eternal Darkness is not a state of being rather a mere videogame. A very cool video game, but a video game regardless.

Anyway, that’s pretty much what is going on here. Spring Break is creeping closer and closer and in turn so is the Buffett concert and, apariently, the Renaissance Festival. So needless-to-say, there’s a lot on the horizon. (Side note: Ethan “Elder” Dickman has again moved. Address available upon request.) So, take care one and all and until we meet again:

And shepherds we shall be, for thee my lord for thee.
Power hath descended forth from thy hand so our feet may swiftly carry out thy command.
And we shall flow a river forth to thee and teaming with souls shall it ever be.
E Nomini Patri, E fili, E Spiritu Sancti.