Justin Cox's Mindless Chatter » Food Network

Bobby Flay is a Big Fat Jerk

Justin — Tue, 24 Mar 2009 01:12:05 +0000

Two Food Network posts in a row, sue me. But yeah, Bobby Flay, he’s a big fat jerk. If you’ve ever seen his show Throwdown then you know what I’m talking about. If you haven’t seen it, let me enlighten you.

Throwdown is a horrible show in which someone who has worked hard to develop a restaurant that specializes in something. The Food Network then approaches these people under the pretense that they’re going to to a special program on them and their food. Then, at the height of the program Bobby Flay shows up and says “yeah, you’re good but I’m way better and I’m about to prove it to you.” There is then a cook-off where a humble restauranteur’s fate is determined by two “judges.” Usually a newspaper restaurant editor and a food blogger. Dripping with high credentials.

Granted, sometimes the restauranteur wins and Bobby Flay’s smug smirk is validation, but then there’s the time that the “judges” choose Bobby’s dish. So the food that people put their souls into is deemed unworthy when the big bad city man comes in and shows off. When Bobby looses he usually says something along the lines of how great the competition was and how glad he is and blah, blah, blah.

The whole premiss of the show is horrid and, frankly Food Network should be ashamed. Bobby Flay may be an Iron Chef and he may be a successful restauranteur himself, but who is he to come in and say someone else’s food is inadequate? He’s a big fat jerk.

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Charm City Cakes is the Coolest Place on Earth

Justin — Fri, 20 Mar 2009 03:36:00 +0000

It’s a pretty simple concept really, Charm City Cakes, home to TV’s Ace of Cakes, is the coolest place on earth. If you’ve never watched the show about cake maker Duff Goldman and his whacky crew consider yourself a complete outcast and go turn on your TV. Now. I’m still waiting. Ok, I’m glad you’re back and now you’re a more enlightened person.

Ace of Cakes has been on a number of years and I never cease to be amazed at the quality the bakery puts out. The cakes are really works of art that are meant to be eaten. But that’s not why Charm City Cakes is the coolest place on earth. No, the cakes have nothing to do with it.

I know you’re waiting in complete and utter anticipation here but I’m watching some NCAA basketball so deal with it. My attention is in two different places. And you’re going to have to wait. Can you tell I’m writing this as I think? Or am I not thinking at all? Anyway, the reason Charm City Cakes is the coolest place on earth is because of the people who work there. Too cliché? Get over it.

You totally wish your job was this awesome.

After the years Chef Duff has been on the Food Network and all the success and fame that comes with that, he still genuinely cares about all of his cakes and all of the people that work for him. His staff are the same fun loving, zany people that they were on the first episode. The place just looks like an awesome place to work. Sure there’s some high pressure and intense projects, but come on, they have some fun there too.

Charm City Cakes is the coolest place on earth because of the super awesome people who work there. That’s all I wanted to say. Thanks for letting me say it. And for putting up with my stream of consciousness. Now, if you want to buy me a Charm City Cake, hook a brother up with some bananas foster, blueberry muffin or smores. Thanks! Oh, and check out Mary Alice’s blog. You’ll be glad you did.

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I’m a Television Snob

Justin — Sun, 05 Oct 2008 02:04:27 +0000

There, I said it, I’m a TV snob. I’m subscribed to Bright House’s HD cable package and receive, I kid you not, around 1000 channels. The problem is I only watch about 7 of them, the HD channels that are all bunched together at the bottom of the dial. I find it too much work to search through the entire guide, so I only look at what’s on the HD channels. It goes something like this:

This is what you get when you search 1329 on Google Images.

What’s on ESPN (1329), ESPN2 (1330) or ESPNU (1331)? Oh, nothing. Alright, let’s move down to Discovery (1340) and Discovery HD Theater (1341). Alright, let’s skim through the rest of the Discovery channel partners (Science, History, TLC, etc) and check out Food Network (1359). The interesting thing is that I completely skip TBS (1312), TNT (1311), Disney (1335) and Family (1337) because they completely bore me — unless TBS is showing baseball which is almost never anymore.

Now, if I find nothing in this run, then I start to get a little adventurous. I’ll check HBO HD (1243) and the networks, NBC (1020) and ABC (1090) — who watches CBS? If still I find nothing worth watching, I’ll either turn on CNN (1324) or just return to ESPN.

I’m sure there are other, really great channels out there, but if I don’t get it in HD it’s really not worth watching — also it’s not worth the effort to find it on the guide. There are, of course, very few exceptions. The biggest one being The Soup which is on E! (65).

Is that wrong? Do you only watch a handful of channels? Let me know down under.

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